Each day is a challenge for Kristen Oehlert.
Her brother shot and killed their mother and then took his own life.
"I have good days and bad," said Oehlert.
For the first time since the murder-suicide in October, Oehlert decided to go public with her private thoughts and her future plans. She also thanked dozens of people for cards, letters, phone calls and messages of support.
She is especially grateful to her co-workers who set up a GoFundMe page to pay for a memorial for her mother and her mother's friend, Alice, who was also shot.
Oehlert described her relationship with her mother, Nicki Alexopoulos, as best friends.
“I think I kind of came to terms that if I cry about it, you know, it’s tears of love,” Oehlert explained.
Alexopoulos was shot and killed on October 25 in her Brookside home by her 38-year-old son. Her son also shot a longtime family friend, Alice, but she survived and is expected to make a full recovery.
Over the past few weeks, Oehlert has been reading her mother’s journals. More than 27 years ago, her mother was the victim of domestic violence. Alice helped her mother escape and start a new life.
The journals gave Oehlert the courage to talk publicly about their life. She explained that her mother was a creative writing teacher who loved to teach and inspired hundreds of students.
Oehlert believes her mother was going to use the journals to share her story and encourage domestic violence victims to get help and get out of the situation.
Now Oehlert plans to finish what her mother started.
“I read through [the journals] word for word and line for line. She had a calling that she wanted to speak about it and speak about domestic violence and the impact it had on families and family violence and support mechanisms,” Oehlert said.
She explained that her relationship with her brother was not close, and they disagreed about many things but she still loved him. Oehlert said her brother had mental health issues and sought treatment occasionally but didn’t stick with it.
Police detectives said the son was stealing large sums of money from his mother, and she had warned him that she might contact police.
Oehlert lost her mother and brother in October but right now she said she can’t think about her brother and what he did. Right now, she can only focus on grieving for her mother.
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Cynthia Newsome can be reached at Cynthia.Newsome@kshb.com.
